Who I am now

I am a 29 year old stay at home mom. I married my husband, Luke almost 3 years ago in a small ceremony in Akumal, Mexico. We welcomed our son, Liam in November 2007. He is a happy, rambunctious little monkey and I love him to pieces.
After 8 weeks of staying home with my then colicky bundle of tears, I returned to work as a receptionist at a plastic surgeon's office. It was 100% the right decision for us at that time and even though it was hard I knew I was doing the right thing. There were good days and bad days. There were times I wanted to pull him out of daycare because I felt he was picking up bad habits and not getting enough attention, but we made it over those humps. After his first birthday I decided I wanted to try for another baby and convinced my husband that having them close together was the best way to raise children.
What did I know?! My parents had 5 kids in 7 years and we were very close growing up and are very close now. I guess I didn't really consider how hard it would be with a little boy going through his terrible twos and an infant. It is the HARDEST thing I have ever experienced. Since I was 27 when we had Liam I felt like we better hurry up and get the show on the road so we wouldn't be the "old parents". Now I realize that's not at all how it will be. Since my mom had her 5th child by the time she was 27, I always felt like I was behind.
Amelia was born in October of 2009 and she has been a breeze compared to Liam as an infant! She is happy and thriving and loves her big brother. Liam mostly ignores her but always gives her her soothie when she spits it out and gives her kisses before bed. He has never shown any jealousy towards her and rarely wants to be on my lap when she is. He isn't much for sitting on laps. He isn't much for sitting, period. He stands while watching Sesame Street. He is always on the go and understands that when I am nursing Amelia he can take off and get into mischief.
I decided not to go back to work while I was still pregnant. I felt like I missed out on a lot of Liam's babyhood and he was getting to a point where he needed more one on one attention so it was the obvious choice for me. I am blessed with the ability to choose whether or not to go back to work and I figured I would regret it if I didn't at least try it.
This winter was hard. I felt like I lost myself. I spent day in and day out cooped up in the house. Amelia was too small to be out in the cold so Liam could play and to be honest, I didn't have the energy to bundle Liam up and pull him through the foot and a half of snow in our backyard. It took a while to get Amelia on a regular sleep schedule so I was with her from the time we got up in the morning (usually Liam would wake us up around 7am) until we both went to bed (around 11pm).
I realized in January that I had 3 choices. Either get a job, go back to school, or find a way to make time for myself. I chose option 3. Luke is very supportive of me cutting out time for myself and even got me a gift certificate to a spa in town just so I could get out of the house. I started going to bed early to read while he took care of Amelia. I joined a group of women that gets together once a month to discuss issues affecting women today. Most recently, I started an Etsy shop selling vintage dishes, clothes etc. and Luke has been very helpful and supportive.
My Etsy shop is a way for me to do what I love while still being home with the kids. I always wanted to open an actual shop with a door but Luke's job requires us to move every seven years so I don't know how I would ever have a real store. Etsy is the next best thing. My shop is called RR 1 Box 80 and if you have ever lived at a rr box you know to say "rural route" and not "rr". It was my address growing up and it is where I became me.
Since I have been searching for myself after being set aside for a while that name seemed appropriate. I am on an exciting journey discovering who I am now.